I feel like my eyeballs have burnt out of their sockets from simply playing this absolutely atrocious ‘game’ (if it can be so called). The premise: you are a ‘gardening mama’ (which is a contradiction in itself, as all mothers are gardeners), who must plant things in her garden, and open a bunch of random packets. I wish one of those packets had contained a BOMB.
Graphics: Exactly the same as cooking mama (a much better game), but the graphics are truly the high point of this app. Seriously, this is not saying much.
Controls: The controls are the most cumbersome that I have ever experienced. You are expected to cut packets of seeds, plant seeds in the ground, and then harvest the full-grown plants. This can be accomplished by touching your screen in certain ways; however, this often accomplishes nothing, because the game does not recognize any of your commands. Ultimately, these controls suck @$$.
Gameplay: Does it even sound like a fun premise?! Who the hell wants to garden on their iPod? That’s what gardens are for!!! The minigames are tedious and extremely boring; honestly, this feels less like a game and more like a punishment. I would rather KILL MY FAVOURITE CHIHUAHUA THAN PLAY THIS PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A GAME.
Recap: I feel like I have DIED A LITTLE INSIDE from simply playing this horrible game. I wish I had spent my time watching paint dry instead. Avoid at all costs, go and buy pocket chef.
Graphics: 6/10 Controls: 2/10 Gameplay: -14/10
Overall: 1/10 DREADFUL
Sincerely,
The Saber-Toothed Haggis and The Unknown Unicorn
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